Monday, July 29, 2013

     Ok, so sometimes my news isn't so good, but it is all I've got. Through no fault of my own, I have relapsed for the 3rd time, and I am pissed off about it. Actually, I have been through denial, depression, self-pity, and now I'm left with anger. I think this emotion is helps me be the strongest, but watch out for the "F" words and close your ears if you can't handle it. I haven't lost my sense of humor yet.
     My spleen has a grape sized tumor on it, and my liver has an enlarged lymph node next to it. Therefore, I am undergoing chemotherapy once again in addition to the Avastin I have been on since day one. At least there is no surgery this time, I am grateful for that. There is always something to be grateful for.
     So, I have been through 3 treatments so far and the side effects are more like the flu than anything. Ironically, I am now on the same drug Amber was on at one time. My sweet Angel is having empathy for her Mom. I feel her presence more now than ever. I know I can go on as she did.
     Meanwhile, my little grands are giving me life and hope and constant love. And Bridgett has been my companion for chemo and anything else that pops up. She is quite a young lady and catches me when I fall. My knight of the square table, Tommy, has been closer than usual as he is home recuperating from rotator cuff surgery on his R arm. We are attached at the hip!
     Keep good thoughts coming!